Sunday, February 26, 2006

Gotta Have it…

The one thing that separates Homo sapiens from all other beings on Earth is the ability to articulate thoughts and feelings. As far as we know no other mammal possesses this ability, it is divinely unique to men and women. Dogs can’t do it, cats can’t do it and as far as modern science has learned neither can the birds or bees.

Probably from the time man first learned to sing or write he expressed an innate need for one thing. That one need that transcends race, age, time, place, class or any other division…


At the root of every story is our need to be loved.That's right L-O-V-E. Shakespeare wrote about it. Billie Holiday yearned for it. The Greeks went to war over it. The Beatles celebrated it. Bernie Mac demands it when he is on stage. We can’t live without it. Some of my favorite songs have the word 'love' in it's title: "I Wish You Love" by the late Joe Bataan, "I Want Your Love' by Chic, 'Walk Away From Love' by David Ruffin, "When Love is New' by Arthur Prysock, "Distant Lover" by Marvin Gaye and "Gimme Some of That Good Ol' Love" by Masta Ase. Yep, even the hardest of the hardest cat needs love.

In 37 years I’ve learned a couple of things; the first thing is that love starts with a healthy perspective of self, if you don’t love you no one else will either. And beware of the type of love you have for yourself. If you have an unhealthy image of who you are you will attract all of the WRONG kinds of people. Even the best-looking people have poor self-esteem.

One of the biggest obstacles a person can face to finding that one love or that true love that they have been looking for all of their lives is loneliness. Navigating our way around loneliness can be like trying to skate around quicksand. Loneliness will make us act against our better instincts and settle for relationships that can be dangerous. That nice smile or banging body is often the disguise worn by a devil. Great sex is good but if the person doesn’t meet our other standards they can potentially be the worse kind of trouble.

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