Tuesday, August 08, 2006

The Return of Flavor Flav

Tune into VH1 for an hour of fist-fights, cuss out sessions, booty-clappin' and cat fights - no Jerry Springer hasn't moved to VH1, Flavor of Love is back for its second season and this time they're keepin' it really real. How real you ask? Doo-doo on the floor real, is that real enough for your ass?

Yes, some ugly child named 'Somethin' dropped somethin' out of her ass and onto the floor. Yep, it happened. I don't know about you, but I would've quit the show right then and there, BAM, I'm gone. I would've left the country for good after that and became a preacher of the gospel somewhere in Antigua. It would be my luck that someone would recognize me: 'Hey mon, aren't you da one dat shit pon da floor?"

Within one minute of the new season there was a fight in the mansion - over a bed! Now you all can talk all the shit you want about me for my next statement, but, fuck it: I would've kept that big-titty havin', $800 weave wearin', 54th and Crenshaw hood rat over that skinny White chick! If he wants to get rid of someone start with the 'Wigga'; then get 'Somethin' a free plane ticket back to somewhere and then settle down with 'Deelicious' who has an azz like ....

Oops, I've gotten too far ahead of myself.

This season 20 more girls vie for the affections of the greatest hype man ever. Some of them are good looking girls. But, beware, there are some others that make Broom Hilda look like Janet Jackson. But let's be honest here, Flav is no catch either.

I recently ran into fellow PE alum Professor Griff of Public Enemy, let's just say he isn't exactly pleased with Flavor nowadays. He says Flavor has done a dis-service to the legacy of Public Enemy with his reality show antics, ie; his buffoonery and his extra-cirrucular activities with White women.

I hear where he's coming from, but its as I told him: If it was Chuck or Griff on those shows messing with White women and clowning around and whatnot, I would be shocked. But, it's Flavor, he's always been the class clown.

Here's a guy that showed up to the American Music Awards waaaaaaaaaay back in the day wearing a top hat and tails - everyone else in the group was wearing their FOI uniform. Here's a guy that did a video shoot in a devil costume. Here's guy who has always had a grill, that nigro has been wearing gold teeth for 20 years! We don't expect much from Flav.

Is Flavor Flav a buffoon? Yeah. Is he a sell out? No. Flavor is being himself, he isn't trying to represent himself as something other than what he is: class clown.

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